This will be our last look at The Time Traveler's Wife, which I finished last night. And when I say I finished it, I mean I bawled my way through the last 20 pages or so.
I can't remember the last time a book made me actually cry, or if a book has ever made me cry so hard.
And that's a good thing!
The book is fantastic. It's realistic, it's emotional, it's incredibly well-constructed and it flows so nicely that you can get lost in it for hours and feel as though no time at all has passed. Clare and Henry are some of the best characters I have come across in quite some time.
And that's what I want to focus on for the rest of this post: Characters.
They're real people. I don't mean that literally, of course, but in a literary sense, they are so real they might as well be flesh and blood. They are flawed -deeply, secretly and at times embarrassingly flawed. They lie, they hurt each other, they fight and they make mistakes.
That is one of the golden parts of this book. Clare and Henry are more passionately in love -and in odder circumstance -than many other characters in modern novels, but their relationship is still as fraught as any other real life relationship. They have Henry's chrono-displacement to worry about, but they also have "normal" problems like trying to have a baby, dealing with a small living space, difficult family relationships, illness, silly little fights over who's going to vacuum (they hire a cleaning service).
Those are the things, as much as the oddity of Henry's condition, that readers are going to take away from this story. They are the things that make The Time Traveler's Wife such a powerful read.
Writers, we hear all the time that our characters must be believable, and that point hits home so clearly in this book. If Clare and Henry fit together easily all the time, or if their families were stereotypically normal -or predictably flawed -this book would not pack the punch that it does.
I don't want to give away any spoilers, but I will say this: even if the book had ended differently than it had, and it ends on an amazingly poignant note, I still would have cried. I still would have put it down feeling slightly dazed by the writing. I would still be looking very closely at my own writing for the emotional power I found here.
Questions
What were your perceptions of the characters in this book?
Writers, how do you achieve emotional complexity without detracting from your plot or goals?
What did you think of the rest of the book?
Showing posts with label book review. Show all posts
Showing posts with label book review. Show all posts
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Saturday, December 19, 2009
'American Gods'
I read a lot of blogs. In fact, I think I spend too much time reading other blogs and neglect my own. Sorry. In other news, new colors! Get excited.
Before I get to the promised review, there was something I wanted to discuss: why we read.
Recently, a teacher in Kansas had to rewrite her curriculum because a bunch of (stupid) parents complained. I think this is ridiculous, but it led me down a different sort of thought process.
The books the teacher had initially chosen were defended because they were books that not only get teens interested in reading, they also help them make sense of their lives (the books were, by and large, about teens in real-life situations). I thought that was an interesting concept -reading to find sense in life. Life is a pretty senseless thing, I think. We have to give meaning to our lives, and no one else can do that for us. Books can definitely help, though, I agree with this teacher.
Books give us a sounding board for our own lives. They let us compare ourselves to other people without envy, malice or pride -characters in books are what they are, and we can read stuff into them until the cows turn blue, but they're not real people. We don't have to be afraid of hurting their feelings when we say that we hate one character for whatever reason, or love a character for another.
We can place ourselves in a spectrum of lives and situations and make an assessment about what we might or might not do, what our reactions would be, whether or not we would ever have gotten into such a situation -and so on, etc. into infinity.
Books help us make sense of ourselves, and it's hard to know the world if you don't know yourself first.
But books serve another purpose -in the above, I'm mostly talking about fiction and novels. They entertain us, but they also educate us about ourselves. However, there are also books that purport to educate us and make us raise our own mental standards, and there are books that serve to entertain us without making much of a social or personal message.
And sometimes escapism is just escapism.
Book review:
In brief, 'American Gods' is rocking my socks off (and I'm not even wearing any socks). It is awesome. I have come to expect this from Gaiman, and rightfully so.
I'm not done with the book yet, so it will be a day or so before I can give a full report, but allow me to ramble a bit now.
The characters in this book will not get out of my head. I've been thinking about Mr. Wednesday all day (I'll try not to give away any spoilers), and I still can't decide whether I hate him, love him and, either way, I don't know if I want him to survive the story. He's a rascal, but he's also kind of sad, and I love how he's unfolding and yet becoming more confusing as the story develops.
Same for Shadow -Shadow is a great character, and I think he's fascinating. He's a relatively passive character: he found a course and he's sticking to it, come hell or high water (and probably both), but he's also a compelling moral study. There's a lot of back story that's still coming to light, so I'm enjoying watching everything come together.
I can't get over the plot, either -I have long wanted to write a short story about what happens to the old gods, the discarded and forgotten gods. Gaiman got there first, and he did a much better job than I could ever hope to. It doesn't mean I won't write something of my own someday, but 'American Gods' is more than satisfying right now.
One last thing about Gaiman before I sign off for the evening: the man knows how to write a good sex scene. The thing I don't like about romance novels/erotica/whatever is that sex generally does not move the plot forward in any way other than that it's just a bunch of inevitable bawdy, lewd, overly descriptive scenes filled with vapid purple prose (and for some people, that's fine -I'm just not one of them). What I admire about Gaiman is that he can make a scene erotic and sensually charged, but it still serves the plot in a big way. His sex scenes reveal something about the characters that you didn't know, but needed to, and they're still...well, sexy, while the plot goes chugging right along. Big points for that.
Before I get to the promised review, there was something I wanted to discuss: why we read.
Recently, a teacher in Kansas had to rewrite her curriculum because a bunch of (stupid) parents complained. I think this is ridiculous, but it led me down a different sort of thought process.
The books the teacher had initially chosen were defended because they were books that not only get teens interested in reading, they also help them make sense of their lives (the books were, by and large, about teens in real-life situations). I thought that was an interesting concept -reading to find sense in life. Life is a pretty senseless thing, I think. We have to give meaning to our lives, and no one else can do that for us. Books can definitely help, though, I agree with this teacher.
Books give us a sounding board for our own lives. They let us compare ourselves to other people without envy, malice or pride -characters in books are what they are, and we can read stuff into them until the cows turn blue, but they're not real people. We don't have to be afraid of hurting their feelings when we say that we hate one character for whatever reason, or love a character for another.
We can place ourselves in a spectrum of lives and situations and make an assessment about what we might or might not do, what our reactions would be, whether or not we would ever have gotten into such a situation -and so on, etc. into infinity.
Books help us make sense of ourselves, and it's hard to know the world if you don't know yourself first.
But books serve another purpose -in the above, I'm mostly talking about fiction and novels. They entertain us, but they also educate us about ourselves. However, there are also books that purport to educate us and make us raise our own mental standards, and there are books that serve to entertain us without making much of a social or personal message.
And sometimes escapism is just escapism.
Book review:
In brief, 'American Gods' is rocking my socks off (and I'm not even wearing any socks). It is awesome. I have come to expect this from Gaiman, and rightfully so.
I'm not done with the book yet, so it will be a day or so before I can give a full report, but allow me to ramble a bit now.
The characters in this book will not get out of my head. I've been thinking about Mr. Wednesday all day (I'll try not to give away any spoilers), and I still can't decide whether I hate him, love him and, either way, I don't know if I want him to survive the story. He's a rascal, but he's also kind of sad, and I love how he's unfolding and yet becoming more confusing as the story develops.
Same for Shadow -Shadow is a great character, and I think he's fascinating. He's a relatively passive character: he found a course and he's sticking to it, come hell or high water (and probably both), but he's also a compelling moral study. There's a lot of back story that's still coming to light, so I'm enjoying watching everything come together.
I can't get over the plot, either -I have long wanted to write a short story about what happens to the old gods, the discarded and forgotten gods. Gaiman got there first, and he did a much better job than I could ever hope to. It doesn't mean I won't write something of my own someday, but 'American Gods' is more than satisfying right now.
One last thing about Gaiman before I sign off for the evening: the man knows how to write a good sex scene. The thing I don't like about romance novels/erotica/whatever is that sex generally does not move the plot forward in any way other than that it's just a bunch of inevitable bawdy, lewd, overly descriptive scenes filled with vapid purple prose (and for some people, that's fine -I'm just not one of them). What I admire about Gaiman is that he can make a scene erotic and sensually charged, but it still serves the plot in a big way. His sex scenes reveal something about the characters that you didn't know, but needed to, and they're still...well, sexy, while the plot goes chugging right along. Big points for that.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
BOOKS!
It’s funny not to have internet on a laptop. Sitting in Wendy’s in Athens, you’d think I would. This campus is so connected, so with it, and yet barely 20 yards off, the connection goes caput. I wanted to come to watch people and write a blog, but the blogging bit isn’t going to work, unless I paste this in later. There’s hardly anyone here, which I would ordinarily like, but right now I want to watch people while I work. Looks like I’m heading somewhere else (when I finish my coffee –generally taking coffee from one coffee shop to another is a quick way to get blacklisted there. Unfortunate but true).
In the meantime, I am excited to start brainstorming ideas for my project. I have to create a book. Or a journal, an anthology, whatever –something where I design a book, come up with an aesthetic mission (and a business plan) and solicit writing from people.
I am so excited I can hardly type about it. Although my enthusiasm in class was dampened by the fact that it had been 8 hours since I’d eaten any food, now that I’m fed and caffeinated, I’m practically vibrating with ideas and thoughts (most of them probably worthy only of the trash heap, but they are there nonetheless).
So what that means, dear readers, is you’re coming along for the ride. I’ll be tossing about ideas, brainstorming, rough drafting, venting, soliciting and working via this blog. And, when it’s all done, I’ll be able to sell it to you –if it’s good enough, that is. These things remain to be seen.
Here's what I've been thinking so far: I want to work with writing of all kinds, especially "hybrid" or what most of us would call weird, experimental or obscure writing (please spare me talk of postmodernism, as it only irritates me. I want substance in my obscurity, not confusion for the sake of being confused). That said, I also want the writing to have a common thread, which I have yet to decide on. I want, I know, some focus on the little things. The things that make us who and what we are from a day-to-day basis (although not necessarily perspective). Whether that's a contemplation of a cup of coffee, a photograph of a pile of notebooks or science fiction absolutely doesn't matter.
I want a bit of it all. Poems, prose (fiction and non and anything in the middle), photography, artwork, whatever -as long as it meets the criterion that I will set forth when I actually do start asking for things, I'll consider it.
Otherwise, I haven't thought much about the format. I'm not entirely sold on the idea of making a traditional anthology/journal thing, because that's too simple (and I like my projects stressful and creative). I was thinking about creating an ebook, or some sort of website where those who want access to the writing would have to pay a one-time fee of $x and if they wanted a physical book, I could do a PoD (print on demand) sort of gig. I don't know yet. I think that's workable, but I also have ZERO experience designing, maintaining or working with a website other than stuff like this and Twitter where I fill in the blank spots with my words and that's all that's required of me. I might end up sticking just with a PoD type book or an ebook for the sake of remaining somewhat sane, but we'll see where it goes.
I still haven't even decided on the aesthetic.
I will admit, though, thinking about this project has made me excited about of the writing I do, both for this blog and for my multiple jobs. Despite loving the payment I get for writing, sometimes the spark just isn't there. Today, though, I remembered that I actually love words. I love the way words sound when you put them next to other words and when you read dictionary entries and when creating something or looking at something someone else made. It's amazing. I love it. It's good to remember that.
In book related news, I was actually mentioned by name in the Amazon blog by the author of the book that I wrote a review of -Legacy. YEAH, WHAT? That's so cool! Mom sent me the link and I about fell off my chair from the coolness of that. I feel super special. And stuff. You'll have to click "Read more" to see it, but it's there. I am that awesome.
No new reviews worth reading right now, but I'm going to write stuff as soon as I finish this and I'll be sure and post links later on.
Just payin the billllls: http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-13594-Cleveland-Literature-Examiner~y2009m9d10-Twilight-New-Moon
In the meantime, I am excited to start brainstorming ideas for my project. I have to create a book. Or a journal, an anthology, whatever –something where I design a book, come up with an aesthetic mission (and a business plan) and solicit writing from people.
I am so excited I can hardly type about it. Although my enthusiasm in class was dampened by the fact that it had been 8 hours since I’d eaten any food, now that I’m fed and caffeinated, I’m practically vibrating with ideas and thoughts (most of them probably worthy only of the trash heap, but they are there nonetheless).
So what that means, dear readers, is you’re coming along for the ride. I’ll be tossing about ideas, brainstorming, rough drafting, venting, soliciting and working via this blog. And, when it’s all done, I’ll be able to sell it to you –if it’s good enough, that is. These things remain to be seen.
Here's what I've been thinking so far: I want to work with writing of all kinds, especially "hybrid" or what most of us would call weird, experimental or obscure writing (please spare me talk of postmodernism, as it only irritates me. I want substance in my obscurity, not confusion for the sake of being confused). That said, I also want the writing to have a common thread, which I have yet to decide on. I want, I know, some focus on the little things. The things that make us who and what we are from a day-to-day basis (although not necessarily perspective). Whether that's a contemplation of a cup of coffee, a photograph of a pile of notebooks or science fiction absolutely doesn't matter.
I want a bit of it all. Poems, prose (fiction and non and anything in the middle), photography, artwork, whatever -as long as it meets the criterion that I will set forth when I actually do start asking for things, I'll consider it.
Otherwise, I haven't thought much about the format. I'm not entirely sold on the idea of making a traditional anthology/journal thing, because that's too simple (and I like my projects stressful and creative). I was thinking about creating an ebook, or some sort of website where those who want access to the writing would have to pay a one-time fee of $x and if they wanted a physical book, I could do a PoD (print on demand) sort of gig. I don't know yet. I think that's workable, but I also have ZERO experience designing, maintaining or working with a website other than stuff like this and Twitter where I fill in the blank spots with my words and that's all that's required of me. I might end up sticking just with a PoD type book or an ebook for the sake of remaining somewhat sane, but we'll see where it goes.
I still haven't even decided on the aesthetic.
I will admit, though, thinking about this project has made me excited about of the writing I do, both for this blog and for my multiple jobs. Despite loving the payment I get for writing, sometimes the spark just isn't there. Today, though, I remembered that I actually love words. I love the way words sound when you put them next to other words and when you read dictionary entries and when creating something or looking at something someone else made. It's amazing. I love it. It's good to remember that.
In book related news, I was actually mentioned by name in the Amazon blog by the author of the book that I wrote a review of -Legacy. YEAH, WHAT? That's so cool! Mom sent me the link and I about fell off my chair from the coolness of that. I feel super special. And stuff. You'll have to click "Read more" to see it, but it's there. I am that awesome.
No new reviews worth reading right now, but I'm going to write stuff as soon as I finish this and I'll be sure and post links later on.
Just payin the billllls: http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-13594-Cleveland-Literature-Examiner~y2009m9d10-Twilight-New-Moon
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Healthy lifestyles and the living dead
Yesterday I came across a book called Fat of the Land. So I wrote a review of it. I haven't read the book, although I'd like to. I tend to do that when I'm short on my own books to review and need something new to write about -review books I haven't read, I mean. I need to get on The Library at Night, but that'll wait until I'm back at school since it's already packed up in a bin and honestly I don't have the stamina to dig through the bins and boxes and bags I'm taking back to find one book no matter how much I love it. Allow me to breathe for a moment -that was quite a sentence.
Anyway, this book. It looks good. I compared the author to Bear Grylls. You know something is being done right when that happens. If I hadn't liked him I'd have compared him to Les Stroud. I hate Les Stroud with a fiery passion that I don't really understand. He just annoys me. I go from annoyance to hatred with spectacular speed, clearly. I also cannot stay on topic today. Not enough caffeine in my system.
Basically the idea of Fat of the Land is that we need to be able to find our own sources of food. Langdon Cook is going to tell you how. And, according to all of the reviews I read and his blog (which I now follow), he's going to do it in a very entertaining manner. All the more reason to drop a few bucks on the book -you could be entertained and save quite a bit of money into the bargain, if you're willing to get your hands dirty.
Awesome.
I've also been writing like a woman possessed for Suite101. I wrote 2 articles yesterday (despite my goal of 3. I do other things with my day than write. Sometimes. Yesterday was just one of them), and of course by write I mean sat down and thumped my keyboard until coherent thoughts formed. It also involved several games on Mindjolt to, you know, get the creative juices flowing.
In the end I got them written, polished and published. Then I went to bed and read a tawdry mystery novel that I didn't really like all that much. If a writer develops his characters so poorly that I can't actually remember their names 180 pages into the book, something is very wrong. But I digress.
Articles!
I reviewed Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (which you should read. The book, I mean. And the review).
I also wrote about Reading and Understanding Ayn Rand. Because I could.
Anyway, this book. It looks good. I compared the author to Bear Grylls. You know something is being done right when that happens. If I hadn't liked him I'd have compared him to Les Stroud. I hate Les Stroud with a fiery passion that I don't really understand. He just annoys me. I go from annoyance to hatred with spectacular speed, clearly. I also cannot stay on topic today. Not enough caffeine in my system.
Basically the idea of Fat of the Land is that we need to be able to find our own sources of food. Langdon Cook is going to tell you how. And, according to all of the reviews I read and his blog (which I now follow), he's going to do it in a very entertaining manner. All the more reason to drop a few bucks on the book -you could be entertained and save quite a bit of money into the bargain, if you're willing to get your hands dirty.
Awesome.
I've also been writing like a woman possessed for Suite101. I wrote 2 articles yesterday (despite my goal of 3. I do other things with my day than write. Sometimes. Yesterday was just one of them), and of course by write I mean sat down and thumped my keyboard until coherent thoughts formed. It also involved several games on Mindjolt to, you know, get the creative juices flowing.
In the end I got them written, polished and published. Then I went to bed and read a tawdry mystery novel that I didn't really like all that much. If a writer develops his characters so poorly that I can't actually remember their names 180 pages into the book, something is very wrong. But I digress.
Articles!
I reviewed Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (which you should read. The book, I mean. And the review).
I also wrote about Reading and Understanding Ayn Rand. Because I could.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Twilight fans are insane
Allow me to preface this story with a confession: I can be a bit of a snob. A jackass, if you will. When it comes to literature, I like to think I know my stuff -and to some extent, I believe that I do. I at least know enough to recognize good writing from bad. I have the ability to pick out themes and symbols and I can write some damn sharp commentary on how certain parts of a book relate to other things that might not even be in the book. I'm a creative writing major, for crying out loud. I know a little bit about writing.
So when I, from an informed viewpoint, say that Twilight sucks...I'm going to agree with myself. It does. If you want a detailed list of reasons, go to my review and read it (or e-mail me and I can send you an even longer, more expletive-filled list; I didn't feel I needed to get overly vitriolic in my already scathing review).
However, I will admit that I'm kind of a dick sometimes. I like pushing people's buttons, especially regarding Twilight. It's just funny to watch/read people getting all hot and bothered about a series of books that I don't like, because their defenses for the book are uniformly lame, unintelligent or illogical. And so it's a win-win situation for me: I get to piss someone off a bit, know that I'm right (at least in my mind) and get a belly laugh out of the whole thing. I've joined a few Twilight fan sites for that express purpose -that and promoting my review (the primary objective, of course).
There's one in particular that proved to be pretty fruitful, for about 3 days. I posted my link in a few relevant places, had some decent discussions and then kind of forgot all about it. I'm not so into hating Twilight that I make it a hobby. It's more of a spur-of-the-moment trolling. A drive by troll, if you will. I haven't actively promoted my Twilight review anywhere in about a month, and on the site this story concerns in over 2 months.
So imagine my surprise when, a mere 2 days ago before I went to see Inglourious Basterds (which I recommend you see, by the way, just because it's awesome) I get an e-mail telling me that someone named Rosalie Hale (one of the Twilight characters' names, for those of you fortunate enough not to have read the series) commented on my profile page. I have a Blackberry (I'm spoiled), so the e-mail came to my phone and my laptop. I don't do a lot of website stuff on my Blackberry unless I'm AFK, so I popped over to my laptop and signed into the website to check out this comment, which I was hoping would be filled with rage about the audacity of my review.
It was certainly filled with rage. And poor spelling, no sense whatsoever and a threat!
Clearly, I thought to myself, clearly this is an important comment.
I read it a few times, deciphering things like "wen" (when), "won" (won't) and there (their) before I was finally able to understand that Rosalie Hale is tired of Twilight haters coming onto the fan site and talking about not liking Twilight -and apparently she had taken it upon herself to track down each and every one of them to inform them that there are anti-Twilight websites they could get on so why not go there? This poorly spelled ramble was finished up with the following sentiment: "I would have my friend use the internet to track them down so I could kick there [sic] !@^$!$$^%^&*#!#%@ ass." I'm not sure what swear word that was supposed to be, but I would really like to find out. I'm sure it's devastating.
So, just to recap: this is a website that I used for 3 days, tops. I posted in 4 threads and all in all commented approximately 20 times, then left. After over 2 months, Rosalie Hale decides I'm a nuisance and should have my !@^$!$$^%^&*#!#%@ing ass kicked.
I returned her comment by asking what her comment was in reference to and why she thought threatening me would get her anything. I received a flood of comments, most of which were the word I, and which sent my phone into a vibrating frenzy, since each comment = 1 email to my phone. There were around 17 of these strange comments before she said anything else of relevance to my question, replying that she's tired of "u stupid haters" getting on to bug fans about how stupid Twilight is.
Well, I thought. Well, well, well. Here we go.
I returned her comment again, entering snotty mode. Basically I said that Twilight haters have every right to be on a fan site expressing themselves, and that fan sites are nothing but a gigantic circle-jerk for people who like Twilight anyway (I actually did use the phrase circle-jerk), so she could pretty much just quit telling me not to talk, since I hadn't said anything to her personally and she got on and told me to shut up when I hadn't even been active.
This story, by the way, is relevant only in that I like how irrational people get about stuff like Twilight. It's amusing to me. I am aware that not all fans of Twilight are insane teenagers who like to threaten people they don't even know over a series of books, but it's surprising how many are. And how many of them manage to find me (online, not in real life. Otherwise I'd be keeping a tally of how many little girls I'd gotten locked up for assault and/or battery).
Onward we go!
After remarking that Twilight fan sites are open to non-fans as well and she had no place attempting to curtail my free speech, she replied by telling me that the only reason "haters are on this site is because 1. they are total jerks and like to bother ppl or 2. they have nothing better to do with their lifes or 3. they havent read the books and are already judgeing it [sic] [sic] [sic] [sic] and [sic]." I'm sure I missed a few [sic]s in there, but we'll live. So you see what I was dealing with?
Not only does she not understand that I'm using her website solely to promote my review (and be a jerk) but she can't even argue with a semblance of intelligence, good grammar or logic. My reply was essentially that yes, I'm a jerk. But I've also read the books, know enough about them to argue with any fan and can do so intelligently and with better grammar. I told her (again) that I was inactive on the site and therefore still did not understand her apparently overwhelming desire to do me physical harm.
I received the reply that "this is a fan site there r sites for haaters [sic] [sic]." etc. and "just because someone says the books sucks doesn't mean it dose [so much sic]."
What?
So I laid out a few reasons that the books suck, reminded her that I'm not an active user, don't define myself as a hater (I don't participate in the so-called "war" that rages betwixt those who worship the ground Stephanie Meyer walks on and those who hate the books. I just hate the books all by myself -I don't need people to commiserate with) and never did anything to her to provoke this unjustified attack, and if I had, I'd have done so with impeccable grammar and spelling.
I was told that I have serious mental problems and need to check myself into a hospital.
"Look, Rosalie. I'm a perfectly normal person (okay, so that's a bit of a lie), but I'm not the one who has issues here. You threatened me for no reason, used poor grammar to do so and can't even come up with a reason why other than that the haters on the site bother you. I'm not one of them, so what's the deal?" This is not an exact quote, but that's the gist of what I told her.
I find out that she has "anger problems" and her mom taught her "never to take shit from ppl [sic]" and she's sick of haters getting onto random threads and talking about how bad Twilight is because there are hater sites for people to "bicth" about hating the books, etc. etc.
I replied without using all caps, which impressed me, because at that point I became aware that this was the sort of person on whom caps lock would have made an impression. Still calm, laughing quietly to myself over the clatter of my keyboard, I replied that she never took any shit from me to begin with. She attacked me, completely unprovoked by anything I had done or said, and all I wanted to know was why.
Her reply? "Why do u think they made anti sites? [sic]"
This person, this "Rosalie Hale," is off the charts batshit insane. The best kind of person to converse with, bar none.
I replied that I had no idea, probably because they could. Anti-Twilight sites, I told her, are as much circle-jerks for people who don't like Twilight as fan sites are for those who do. I have no need to sit around and agree with a bunch of people online about not liking a series of books. That's even more pointless than, oh, say, threatening someone who never said a damn thing to or about you because there is a difference of opinion.
I think I finally got through with that comment, because she backtracked, saying only that she is sick of the fighting and people arguing all the time.
So your solution, I asked her, was to threaten me? That's how you thought to defuse the Twilight debates? By threatening to kick the ass of an inactive site member? Bullshit.
She fled, leaving me with a comment that I imagine would have been sobbed if spoken. "I'm so tired of this. I'm giving my sister my account. Rose out."
Yes. That all just happened.
Take a few deep breaths. This was a long one. I won't inflict much more on you, readers, but just let all of this sink in. That was the logic of a Twilight fan -the logic of the many who comment on my review.
"First," they must think, "I'll try to intimidate you into shutting up about my beloved books, then I'll attempt to out-logic you using circular or flawed reasoning"- (we didn't even discuss the books all that much), "then I'll act like a pitiable little puppy and run away feeling like a victim."
Her sister commented on my profile shortly after Rosalie deleted all relevant comments and asked what the deal was. I told her that Rosalie had first tried to scare me and failed, then tried to argue with me, and lost. It happens a lot.
Any takers? I'm spoiling for a fight.
So when I, from an informed viewpoint, say that Twilight sucks...I'm going to agree with myself. It does. If you want a detailed list of reasons, go to my review and read it (or e-mail me and I can send you an even longer, more expletive-filled list; I didn't feel I needed to get overly vitriolic in my already scathing review).
However, I will admit that I'm kind of a dick sometimes. I like pushing people's buttons, especially regarding Twilight. It's just funny to watch/read people getting all hot and bothered about a series of books that I don't like, because their defenses for the book are uniformly lame, unintelligent or illogical. And so it's a win-win situation for me: I get to piss someone off a bit, know that I'm right (at least in my mind) and get a belly laugh out of the whole thing. I've joined a few Twilight fan sites for that express purpose -that and promoting my review (the primary objective, of course).
There's one in particular that proved to be pretty fruitful, for about 3 days. I posted my link in a few relevant places, had some decent discussions and then kind of forgot all about it. I'm not so into hating Twilight that I make it a hobby. It's more of a spur-of-the-moment trolling. A drive by troll, if you will. I haven't actively promoted my Twilight review anywhere in about a month, and on the site this story concerns in over 2 months.
So imagine my surprise when, a mere 2 days ago before I went to see Inglourious Basterds (which I recommend you see, by the way, just because it's awesome) I get an e-mail telling me that someone named Rosalie Hale (one of the Twilight characters' names, for those of you fortunate enough not to have read the series) commented on my profile page. I have a Blackberry (I'm spoiled), so the e-mail came to my phone and my laptop. I don't do a lot of website stuff on my Blackberry unless I'm AFK, so I popped over to my laptop and signed into the website to check out this comment, which I was hoping would be filled with rage about the audacity of my review.
It was certainly filled with rage. And poor spelling, no sense whatsoever and a threat!
Clearly, I thought to myself, clearly this is an important comment.
I read it a few times, deciphering things like "wen" (when), "won" (won't) and there (their) before I was finally able to understand that Rosalie Hale is tired of Twilight haters coming onto the fan site and talking about not liking Twilight -and apparently she had taken it upon herself to track down each and every one of them to inform them that there are anti-Twilight websites they could get on so why not go there? This poorly spelled ramble was finished up with the following sentiment: "I would have my friend use the internet to track them down so I could kick there [sic] !@^$!$$^%^&*#!#%@ ass." I'm not sure what swear word that was supposed to be, but I would really like to find out. I'm sure it's devastating.
So, just to recap: this is a website that I used for 3 days, tops. I posted in 4 threads and all in all commented approximately 20 times, then left. After over 2 months, Rosalie Hale decides I'm a nuisance and should have my !@^$!$$^%^&*#!#%@ing ass kicked.
I returned her comment by asking what her comment was in reference to and why she thought threatening me would get her anything. I received a flood of comments, most of which were the word I, and which sent my phone into a vibrating frenzy, since each comment = 1 email to my phone. There were around 17 of these strange comments before she said anything else of relevance to my question, replying that she's tired of "u stupid haters" getting on to bug fans about how stupid Twilight is.
Well, I thought. Well, well, well. Here we go.
I returned her comment again, entering snotty mode. Basically I said that Twilight haters have every right to be on a fan site expressing themselves, and that fan sites are nothing but a gigantic circle-jerk for people who like Twilight anyway (I actually did use the phrase circle-jerk), so she could pretty much just quit telling me not to talk, since I hadn't said anything to her personally and she got on and told me to shut up when I hadn't even been active.
This story, by the way, is relevant only in that I like how irrational people get about stuff like Twilight. It's amusing to me. I am aware that not all fans of Twilight are insane teenagers who like to threaten people they don't even know over a series of books, but it's surprising how many are. And how many of them manage to find me (online, not in real life. Otherwise I'd be keeping a tally of how many little girls I'd gotten locked up for assault and/or battery).
Onward we go!
After remarking that Twilight fan sites are open to non-fans as well and she had no place attempting to curtail my free speech, she replied by telling me that the only reason "haters are on this site is because 1. they are total jerks and like to bother ppl or 2. they have nothing better to do with their lifes or 3. they havent read the books and are already judgeing it [sic] [sic] [sic] [sic] and [sic]." I'm sure I missed a few [sic]s in there, but we'll live. So you see what I was dealing with?
Not only does she not understand that I'm using her website solely to promote my review (and be a jerk) but she can't even argue with a semblance of intelligence, good grammar or logic. My reply was essentially that yes, I'm a jerk. But I've also read the books, know enough about them to argue with any fan and can do so intelligently and with better grammar. I told her (again) that I was inactive on the site and therefore still did not understand her apparently overwhelming desire to do me physical harm.
I received the reply that "this is a fan site there r sites for haaters [sic] [sic]." etc. and "just because someone says the books sucks doesn't mean it dose [so much sic]."
What?
So I laid out a few reasons that the books suck, reminded her that I'm not an active user, don't define myself as a hater (I don't participate in the so-called "war" that rages betwixt those who worship the ground Stephanie Meyer walks on and those who hate the books. I just hate the books all by myself -I don't need people to commiserate with) and never did anything to her to provoke this unjustified attack, and if I had, I'd have done so with impeccable grammar and spelling.
I was told that I have serious mental problems and need to check myself into a hospital.
"Look, Rosalie. I'm a perfectly normal person (okay, so that's a bit of a lie), but I'm not the one who has issues here. You threatened me for no reason, used poor grammar to do so and can't even come up with a reason why other than that the haters on the site bother you. I'm not one of them, so what's the deal?" This is not an exact quote, but that's the gist of what I told her.
I find out that she has "anger problems" and her mom taught her "never to take shit from ppl [sic]" and she's sick of haters getting onto random threads and talking about how bad Twilight is because there are hater sites for people to "bicth" about hating the books, etc. etc.
I replied without using all caps, which impressed me, because at that point I became aware that this was the sort of person on whom caps lock would have made an impression. Still calm, laughing quietly to myself over the clatter of my keyboard, I replied that she never took any shit from me to begin with. She attacked me, completely unprovoked by anything I had done or said, and all I wanted to know was why.
Her reply? "Why do u think they made anti sites? [sic]"
This person, this "Rosalie Hale," is off the charts batshit insane. The best kind of person to converse with, bar none.
I replied that I had no idea, probably because they could. Anti-Twilight sites, I told her, are as much circle-jerks for people who don't like Twilight as fan sites are for those who do. I have no need to sit around and agree with a bunch of people online about not liking a series of books. That's even more pointless than, oh, say, threatening someone who never said a damn thing to or about you because there is a difference of opinion.
I think I finally got through with that comment, because she backtracked, saying only that she is sick of the fighting and people arguing all the time.
So your solution, I asked her, was to threaten me? That's how you thought to defuse the Twilight debates? By threatening to kick the ass of an inactive site member? Bullshit.
She fled, leaving me with a comment that I imagine would have been sobbed if spoken. "I'm so tired of this. I'm giving my sister my account. Rose out."
Yes. That all just happened.
Take a few deep breaths. This was a long one. I won't inflict much more on you, readers, but just let all of this sink in. That was the logic of a Twilight fan -the logic of the many who comment on my review.
"First," they must think, "I'll try to intimidate you into shutting up about my beloved books, then I'll attempt to out-logic you using circular or flawed reasoning"- (we didn't even discuss the books all that much), "then I'll act like a pitiable little puppy and run away feeling like a victim."
Her sister commented on my profile shortly after Rosalie deleted all relevant comments and asked what the deal was. I told her that Rosalie had first tried to scare me and failed, then tried to argue with me, and lost. It happens a lot.
Any takers? I'm spoiling for a fight.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Suite101, Marian Keyes and Other Nonsense
I fell through the cracks yesterday and didn't update. I felt funky all day, culminating in a migraine that I was able to kill with lots of coffee and some motrin (I've discovered that if I feel a migraine coming on, mainlining caffeine and inhaling motrin as fast as possible will generally work to beat it back into submission. By which I mean I'll just have a mildly bad headache and feel dizzy the rest of the evening). Worth it, because I went to see Inglourious Basterds with Jonah and I wouldn't have wanted to miss out on it for anything. Awesome, disgusting, disturbing, funny piece of film.
So! Time for the reading corner portion of this blog.
I've begun writing extensively for Suite101, which is awesome. I have 7 articles up right now -almost at my 3 month minimum after barely a week of writing. I think that's pretty cool.
The first three were posted in a previous entry (and are pretty easy to find if you click around on these next few or go to my profile).
The most interesting thing about writing for Suite is that, unlike writing for Examiner, I'm not just limited to literature. Granted, that's my forte. That's what I like -I eat, breathe, drink, dream and exist surrounded by literature, but I've found that I can write about other stuff pretty well too -which is encouraging, since I plan on applying at another writing website where you write to what they want. I'm enjoying stretching my writing boundaries -I hate feeling stagnant, which reviews were starting to do just a little for me.
I still love them, I'd still write them for a living if I could (and hey, maybe I can), but it's nice to also write about
So that's Suite! I'm loving writing for it already. It's fun to learn how to research and use keywords, format articles and get really concise. Writing 400-800 word articles is actually challenging for me, which is new. I'm not used to having to rein in my verbosity, so it's making a nice change. Of course that just means I'll get all the more wordy on here, but then I'm not really getting paid to be concise on my blog, am I?
S101 is a fantastic website. Not just because I write for it (obviously that helps, ha ha), but because they're very concerned with quality writing. The articles on there are pretty much uniformly good -there's still so much personal style in each one, but they're all informative, interesting and easily read. I've been snooping around on Suite a lot more since I got hired and I'm more and more impressed.
I'm also becoming slowly disillusioned with Examiner. Granted, I love it. I like being able to sit down and crank out a short piece on anything I want (as long as it involves literature) and get paid for it over time...but the way my page views fluctuate smells strongly of fishiness to me. Getting 5oo+ views one day and only 45 the next doesn't make much sense, especially when I update with awesome articles (if I may say so myself) just about every day. Seriously. I'm writing view-whore articles about back-to-school stuff, and it's like a snowstorm of views one day and the friggin' Sahara the next. Something is rotten in the area of my Examiner reviews, methinks, but whatever. I'm still making money (sort of), so it's good.
Yesterday I found a book written by a 16 year old girl that's won a ton of awards and actually looks like something I'd read. So I reviewed it (yes without having read it, so sue me) and I'm hoping eventually I'll pick up a copy.
It's called Legacy. Check it out.
In other book news, I made one last binging library visit. I swore I was just going in to get their sole copy of The Fountainhead on VHS (the first half of which I watched yesterday in a headache-induced half-slumber in the basement), and left with it and four books. For shame, for shame. Whatever. I'm a book whore, I really can't help it. If it has pages and text and inky goodness, I want it.
The first book I grabbed out of my towering stack of four books (no, really. One of them is a SF anthology, and it's about as big as my torso, boobs included) is Marian Keyes' book Under the Duvet. It's about her life as a writer -it's all nonfiction, so finding it in the fiction section sort of bummed me out regarding the library's efficiency, but it's not like I was actively looking for it, so serendipity was working in my favor. Reading this book is sort of like a guideline for a path I don't want to take but could see myself skirting along the edges of. Not her alcoholism or crippling insecurities, but the writing bit.
She makes it sound like fun again, which is refreshing. I've read too many things by writers who bitch and moan about writing like they have to cut off their own leg in order to get 3 words onto the page. Yeah, I know that's how it feels sometimes (I'm in college and still writing academic papers, I absolutely know how that feels), but why can't writers ever expostulate about the times when the words just come running out of the pen or away from the keyboard like they can't wait to plaster themselves all over the page? Why is it always the monumental struggle, the staring at blank paper until your forehead bleeds, the writer's block? All of those things happen, but they make the art of writing look like walking through a room filled with broken glass while drunk and blindfolded. It's not always like that. Sometimes it's awesome.
So that's why I'm liking Keyes. She's not a great writer, I don't think, but she's funny and refreshing and honest. I'd totally recommend checking her out, whether you're a writer or just need some laughs. She writes about pretty much anything -from her alcoholism to buying a house with her husband (who she calls Himself) to getting free samples of makeup. It's a cute book.
That's all for today folks -I think I more than filled the space that would have been taken by yesterday's post and hopefully I've given you a few things to read or think about or argue over (even with me).
Tomorrow we'll have a Twilight-related bit. Fans are interesting people.
So! Time for the reading corner portion of this blog.
I've begun writing extensively for Suite101, which is awesome. I have 7 articles up right now -almost at my 3 month minimum after barely a week of writing. I think that's pretty cool.
The first three were posted in a previous entry (and are pretty easy to find if you click around on these next few or go to my profile).
The most interesting thing about writing for Suite is that, unlike writing for Examiner, I'm not just limited to literature. Granted, that's my forte. That's what I like -I eat, breathe, drink, dream and exist surrounded by literature, but I've found that I can write about other stuff pretty well too -which is encouraging, since I plan on applying at another writing website where you write to what they want. I'm enjoying stretching my writing boundaries -I hate feeling stagnant, which reviews were starting to do just a little for me.
I still love them, I'd still write them for a living if I could (and hey, maybe I can), but it's nice to also write about
- The Dangers of Driving and Texting
- The Best Way to Organize Notes for College Students
- The Best Study Tips for College Students
- Parent-Child Relationships in King Lear
So that's Suite! I'm loving writing for it already. It's fun to learn how to research and use keywords, format articles and get really concise. Writing 400-800 word articles is actually challenging for me, which is new. I'm not used to having to rein in my verbosity, so it's making a nice change. Of course that just means I'll get all the more wordy on here, but then I'm not really getting paid to be concise on my blog, am I?
S101 is a fantastic website. Not just because I write for it (obviously that helps, ha ha), but because they're very concerned with quality writing. The articles on there are pretty much uniformly good -there's still so much personal style in each one, but they're all informative, interesting and easily read. I've been snooping around on Suite a lot more since I got hired and I'm more and more impressed.
I'm also becoming slowly disillusioned with Examiner. Granted, I love it. I like being able to sit down and crank out a short piece on anything I want (as long as it involves literature) and get paid for it over time...but the way my page views fluctuate smells strongly of fishiness to me. Getting 5oo+ views one day and only 45 the next doesn't make much sense, especially when I update with awesome articles (if I may say so myself) just about every day. Seriously. I'm writing view-whore articles about back-to-school stuff, and it's like a snowstorm of views one day and the friggin' Sahara the next. Something is rotten in the area of my Examiner reviews, methinks, but whatever. I'm still making money (sort of), so it's good.
Yesterday I found a book written by a 16 year old girl that's won a ton of awards and actually looks like something I'd read. So I reviewed it (yes without having read it, so sue me) and I'm hoping eventually I'll pick up a copy.
It's called Legacy. Check it out.
In other book news, I made one last binging library visit. I swore I was just going in to get their sole copy of The Fountainhead on VHS (the first half of which I watched yesterday in a headache-induced half-slumber in the basement), and left with it and four books. For shame, for shame. Whatever. I'm a book whore, I really can't help it. If it has pages and text and inky goodness, I want it.
The first book I grabbed out of my towering stack of four books (no, really. One of them is a SF anthology, and it's about as big as my torso, boobs included) is Marian Keyes' book Under the Duvet. It's about her life as a writer -it's all nonfiction, so finding it in the fiction section sort of bummed me out regarding the library's efficiency, but it's not like I was actively looking for it, so serendipity was working in my favor. Reading this book is sort of like a guideline for a path I don't want to take but could see myself skirting along the edges of. Not her alcoholism or crippling insecurities, but the writing bit.
She makes it sound like fun again, which is refreshing. I've read too many things by writers who bitch and moan about writing like they have to cut off their own leg in order to get 3 words onto the page. Yeah, I know that's how it feels sometimes (I'm in college and still writing academic papers, I absolutely know how that feels), but why can't writers ever expostulate about the times when the words just come running out of the pen or away from the keyboard like they can't wait to plaster themselves all over the page? Why is it always the monumental struggle, the staring at blank paper until your forehead bleeds, the writer's block? All of those things happen, but they make the art of writing look like walking through a room filled with broken glass while drunk and blindfolded. It's not always like that. Sometimes it's awesome.
So that's why I'm liking Keyes. She's not a great writer, I don't think, but she's funny and refreshing and honest. I'd totally recommend checking her out, whether you're a writer or just need some laughs. She writes about pretty much anything -from her alcoholism to buying a house with her husband (who she calls Himself) to getting free samples of makeup. It's a cute book.
That's all for today folks -I think I more than filled the space that would have been taken by yesterday's post and hopefully I've given you a few things to read or think about or argue over (even with me).
Tomorrow we'll have a Twilight-related bit. Fans are interesting people.
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